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Monday, January 4, 2010

Small Reminder - MDMA is not Dinner

Whazzzzzup, back from the Peg for a week now and STRANGELY enough, I miss my crazy fucking family... I KNOW. Weird considering I was almost going to murder somebody about 8 days ago. If only there were some way of spending time with your family without actually having to like, you know, talk to them and stuff. That would be just great. Actually I sort of find that cooking for my family sort of works. This somehow makes me feel like I'm spending time with them when really they're just kind of in the background, plus then when the food is ready they can't say anything for a bit because their mouths are all full. THEN, afterwards, they have to be all nice to me because I just made food suddenly appear in front of them and everyone loves THAT.

Oh.... except ravers, apparently.

Anyone else notice this conversation last week? It has several different variables but mainly goes something this: Blah blah blah, holidaze were good but I ate too much, blah blah, oh my GOD I am like SO FAT now at my 5 to 8 pound weight gain because my mom made a shitload of my favorite cookies and chocolate was everywhere and I sat down to this gorgeous, delicious giant dinner and then, horror of horrors, everyone expected me to EAT IT. IT WAS AWFUL, THERE IS NO GOD, DON'T LOOK AT ME, I'M HIDEOUS, HIDEOUS!!!!!!

Um.

Ok, so. The West Coast is already skinnier than other parts of the country. It's true, check Stats Canada http://www.statcan.gc.ca/pub/82-620-m/2005001/c-g/adults-adutles/4053576-eng.htm. Probably due to all the bicycling / MEC wearing / yoga practicing and of course the plethora of available soy products, as well as the Asian influence (how many fat Asians do you know? That's what I thought. By the way, who do I have to kill to get some more hot black guys to move here??? SERIOUSLY)... but I ask you... is it possible that all these factors have resulted in extra sensitive body image and more sneaky high-school style anorexia? EVEN in progressive and love-filled lands such as: Of the Ravers? (NB: I use the term Ravers loosely to describe the electronic music scene as a whole - techno / hip hop / tribal / hippie / dnb/ dubstep / etc etc. It's a term reclamation and stufff). It's weird, because recreational choices that often include marathon dancing, yoga, mind-expanding drug-use and vegan-ism aren't exactly a recipe for obesity. In fact you would think that the assumed accompanying neo-hippie mentality would perhaps encourage people to take care of themselves by eating enough. So why do I keep encountering more and more shrinking women on the dance floor who say they are simply "forgetting to eat"? Hrmmmmmmmm.

Now if you've ever uttered that line, please know that I DO realize that it IS sometimes quite genuine to get caught up and lose track of everything. My mother, for example, is a crazy work-a-holic who will go for hours without so much as a nibble... one day she prescribed yogurt to me for my upset tummy because it once "helped my stomach stop hurting when it was empty". Um... you mean HUNGER? Rrrrright. (I love that woman). BUT I'mma be straight up now..."forgetting to eat" as a habit can start to look like a weight management technique after awhile, even if it's subconscious. After all, you didn't forget to put on clothes today and that's also necessary - oh wait, bad example cause I SO never wear clothes - ummm... ok, retry. You didn't forget to go to the bathroom today, right? Better example. Yes.

Now I get that a lot of time not eating is a mere result of lack of planning. Things are stressful, there's a million to-do's and food is a lower priority at that exact moment. This actually used to be a big Sweet Soul move in the first days of throwing shows... we'd be so busy and have forgotten all about food. Then we'd remember by the time it was simply too late to go get something. You can usually tell which events those were by the subsequent photos of us looking SHITFACED by about 10:30 pm (usually one of our eyes is kind of closed, our grins are lopsided and my boobs are hanging out, like more than normal). Now we make time cause we got sick of peeling each other's faces off the floor. In general, I find that if you can plan your outfit, you can plan your dinner. PS: MDMA is not dinner, ummkayyy?

You've probably noticed that people who don't eat not only get more wasted, they also get "hangry". You know "hangry", it's a combo of "hungry" and "angry" and occurs when your brain keeps thinking about food instead of how to act like a nice person. I've also noticed hanger in some extreme I-ONLY-eat-organic-seaweed people which can also start to look like sneaky anorexia sometimes. Cause I know lots of vegans, and they actually eat a lot of shit. Some of it's even tasty!

Ok. I should take a time-out to assure you that I'm not saying this to hate on anybody. And I know that you can be naturally thin while having healthy eating habits. And those who struggle with their self image, I'm not judging, I love you, I'm there on and off like anyone else. BUT. Those who are forgetting to eat. Please remember how powerful you are, especially within a subculture that doesn't buy into conventional TV-land. Social influence quickly replace media influence in such circles and trends spread quicker than my legs in 2006 (good year. sigh.). What I mean is that for every cool-looking chick who forgets to eat, another four also start forgetting. Then suddenly everyone's friends are trying to maintain this weird starvation weight by not eating and they start taking more drugs or speed or diet pills to maintain their energy levels. AND MEANWHILE, EVERYONE IS HANGRY. It's a world I don't enjoy. Reminds me too much of ballet school. You wanna see HANGER? Try CP at age 14. Not pretty. No pun intended.

Ravers of the World: let us eat. I promise everyone will still look nice in their gorgeous hand-made organic bamboo cotton backless dresses. And for fuck's sake, no jumping off the Lion's Gate bridge because you ate that extra box of chocolates this Christmas. It's the holidaze, for crying out loud. You were drunk.

And now here is a gratuitous un-graded, un-retouched shot of my un-starving bum captured by Tallulah. Send it to all your hot black friends immediately and tell them to visit Vancouver. (Yes, I know it's a stereotype, but there's also another stereotype about hot black men that I've also found to be pretty true, so whateves. Do it).



Heh heh.

kisse n' kix
xoxo
CP

Monday, December 7, 2009

CHURCH

So here I am, 4am, Sunday morning... again my weekend flipped me hard upside down and nearly killed me... but it damn, was it ever fun. NOT expecting the Bassnectar afterparty at Dollhouse to get so slammed, but apparently I was the only person who wasn't expecting it since apparently he's some cultural icon now or something. Full in an hour with 200 hundred people outside and two stretch limos sitting there? No wonder the po-po showed up and shut the party down (even though they were nice and waiting until about 5am). This of course was a first for us but it was bound to happen at some point and I'm not sorry (I'm not worried about any future visits or anything). In fact if Vancouver's finest hadn't kicked everyone out I'm pretty sure the party would have gone until noon. It was a fitting end for our staff Christmas party, considering that it was called CHURCH. The Basscoast grrlz really set it up; Liz ended up having to stay up in Whistler for the night to take care of her little one after paintstakingly setting up the alter (bummer) and called to tell me that her phone had been going off all night with people trying to get in and saying that the line-up OUTSIDE was even fun... Church party indeed. I even managed to get Ronin into a cute alter boy outfit before the show, but only for a moment (it was a hot moment though). Another well-known DJ accidentally took the wrong acid and was high for the whole next day AS WELL and just finally came back into the world. Whuppppps, careful of that stuff coming from Nelson people. It's for real. Also cuts of images from the haziness... shots of us spanking Self Evident's hot ass behind the decks, Andrea our right hand grrl LITERALLY shop-vacuuming the unfortunate clog in the main toilet with the help of a random amazing couple (!!!) and all the while, a giant statue of Jesus with his bleeding heart thumping steadily to the bass in front of the booth. Did I mention the show at the beginning of the night featuring Melody Mangler & Voodoo Pixie sucking either end of a fat candy stick on their knees? AND I wasn't wear pants the whole night, PS. Yes, this is my real life.

But now another week begins; one week before I head back to the shivering city of Winnipeg to reflect for two weeks and put the finishing touches on my SassMaster Plan for life A.D. (After Dollhouse, of course). I'm ready for it for sure. These nights of epic debauchery have been fun and fabulous and a needed change from the machine... and I still plan on helping to make stuff happen like this... just maybe not so OFTEN. Another time, as I've said before, there will be a way to maintain space in the city for these kinds of events without the grind. I absolutely know it. I'm proud to see that so many of the underground peeps are now able to throw shows in nightclubs; makes it so much easier on everyone. No rental fees, no security fees, no need to turn it down (words I hope to never utter again in my fucking life)... whereas our space came out of a need. It's been nearly impossible to fill a room or get a decent night anywhere in this city at a conventional nightclub for us in the past, and it's still nearly impossible to get a Friday or Saturday. Hard work and the attention music is getting is now changing that. The support is there, the artists are getting the attention and as far as venues go, this city hasn't seen the last of us yet (ummmkayyy?). Part of it I think is that mainstream culture is just SO generic right now, I daresay almost more than ever before. I mean, I know there's trends and stuff but it just seems like they're spitting out the same shit in different piles over and over and over and over, and people are needing something else. BADLY. Unfortunately it means that some of the art we've worked so hard to get out there gets co-opted into harsh crap that totally misses the point, Pussy Cat Dolls and "McDubstep" remixes of your least favorite pop songs included (don't even get me started about "McDubstep"... trust me, you'll hear more about it in a future post). But there's always the flipside and it's really a small price to pay to get to reach out to so many people who may hear something that cracks open their entire world.

The need for escapism and alternative culture continues. I'm just not sure that the party element is what I actually personally need at the moment. It's kind of been something that I've valued and so I've put a lot of heart and sass and spirit into trying to provide at least somewhat nurturing options for the thinking person's party... but it's also to create a space for us to meet each other, and a platform for alternative artists, including myself. It has been rewarding... but how often have I actually taken the chance to really stand up on that platform? And how many other ones like it are out there? I wonder...

I'm thinking it's almost time to find out.

xoxo
CP

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Scraping off the plate, getting chalk up on the slate... soaking up, wringing out, getting loud loud LOUD.

Blah blah blah, ok, ok... so... I haven't really been bloggy with it since I FULLY intended to do so again back in FEBRUARY already, for crying out loud. Of course I decided it would be a great idea to express as much to like, everyone I know... kind of like when that friend of yours decides to quit smoking and figures that blabbing about it will create some sort of positive peer pressure support incentive not to start again... but really, it just makes the friend feel kinda silly should she ultimately fails and starts smoking again. I am SO that girl. Except you know, cuter.

Anyway, in all fairness, my plate's been REALLY full of shit for the last few years, and unfortunately by "shit" I don't ACTUALLY mean "cheese" (a reality which I feel is total effing bullcrap). Nope, the "shit" I refer to is the "shit" that finds itself on your to-do list when you somehow convince yourself that you can helm several billion community / arts / groups / sass projects and simultaneously manage to sleep properly, eat properly, stay organized, continue to grow as an artist, maintain your personal relationships, pay your rent and oh yeah, rock hot new outfits dripping in your homecooked dopesauce. To think it took me four fucking years to realize that none of this was actually possible without a team of about 10 billion Cabana boyz, who in all fairness should probably be delegated to single moms instead of narcissistic party promoter diva bitches. Fuck fuck fuck. Teddy must have been making some strong-ass cocktails behind that red sparkly bar of ours for me to lose touch so fully and completely... oh yeah, HE WAS. And LOOK, see? "Blogging" wasn't even anywhere on the list!

HOWEVER. I actually do feel like I'm finally managing to permanently scrape some of the shit off my plate so I can catch my breath a bit and remember what it feels like to be a real human who likes to take walks, make brown-rice spaghetti, and rant randomly online about whatever amuses her or pisses her off. Turns out a grrl feels more inclined to do so when she has free time to actually THINK about stuff. I know, SHOCKING, huh.

Turns out also that a grrl tends to turn out better work when she feels inspired and all spongy, which is DEFINITELY how I felt after coming home from New York City about three weeks ago. I felt like a new woman on only a slightly altered mission. It made me realize even more that Vancouver is such a baby city... a beautiful city that I love, despite its need of a severe ass-lighting... and that the fight we fight to expand and deepen the culture / arts communities here is an age-old battle that has been fought and won and reflected in cities all over the globe... we're just a little behind is all. One day it will be possible for me to sustainably apply what I've learned in the last two years as a party promoter, festival producer and venue owner... but interestingly enough, I think that will be the day I'll no longer have to fight my way up from the underground. In the meantime, I plan to relish in the current rawness of it all. And I think maybe that means it's a good time for me to get some shit out on stage, or on a record, or on this blog, or wherever. So it's where I'm at... I just hope I can put my mouth where my brain is. I think I just sort of have to, because otherwise I don't really seem to work properly... I just feel sort of broken. Time for some renovations and a couple of good artistic fixes.

Speaking of which, lately I'm loving just letting burlettas come out however they want to... sometimes I feel like singing, sometimes stripping or strutting, or all three, sometimes rhyming or even just MCing the show in the classic sense with introducing the acts and hosting. And sometimes I NEED to create a new mohawk headdress or to tightlace into a corset... but then sometimes it's not so much the craftsmanship of what I'm wearing so much as the idea that it creates the desired effect for the piece, or even that I just get off on raging garters and an outrageous plastic jacket I giggled over in a bargain basement thrift shop. The point is that I'm open to whatever seems entertaining or interesting, and letting stuff go where it wants and develop into its own aesthetic and its own genre organically and all my own. And I really like where it's going, much more, I think, than if I was driving at something specifically.

It's almost like, you know, being an artist or something. ;)

Sass.

xoxo
CP

Thursday, February 26, 2009

This is Why We're Hot

Photobucket



i'd like to address that
i'm still obsessed
with burlesque
i been workin' pretty hard since you seen me last
i passed the class
amassed
true believers in sass
& i ain't talkin' bout some uninspired tittie flash
& cash
will come but i ain't one for money grabs -
i'm not tanning or perfecting my abs
in fact, i'm still me
& forever CP
& i'll be killin' it onstage
where i'm meant to be

i gotta story bout a glory
that i didn't quite have yet
a little birdie spread it all over the internet
i read my words coming back to me
comin' soon it'll be on everybody's TV

a little Slice of advice for free
not every player in this game's got integrity
had to take a step back
was beginning to crack
needed to re-assess my needs
a new plan of attack
that's why they call us all troupes
cause we're fighting the fight
tryin' to get some shit started like I will tonight

hold tight & enjoy the ride
all the party freak grrls Dollhouse tonight
all my rockabilly grrls Dollhouse tonight
all my punk rock ladies Dollhouse tonight
all my liberated men Dollhouse tonight
got the big bass movement with some freedom in sight
so invite your best friend
let go if you can
gonna gather here together saying Fuck The Man.

now before i clear the stage i got one last thing to say
a shared love can be as simple as a DJ
my saving grace a lot of times is play
i think as far as playing goes we might be doin' okay ;)
i never wanna lose my sense of pretend
& that is how we will survive in the end
so if you find yourself left with just yourself & your friends
then you've got everything you need
we'll be provin' that next.